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Post by tulip on Jul 26, 2022 13:09:06 GMT
I will applaud her for limiting the electronics. It's wonderful that he experiences life instead of just watching it on a screen like too many kids do these days (I sound like a cranky old lady!). IMO she's waaaay too attached to him. |
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Post by notoriousmkg on Jul 26, 2022 14:54:30 GMT
I have a coworker who is a brilliant guy. Technical expert is his area. Extensive knowledge of history, literature and religion. Apparently has never owned a TV. Only sees movies occasionally. Every single pop culture reference flies completely by him. |
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Post by Tati on Jul 26, 2022 15:18:58 GMT
Lying in bed having a leisurely wank....right next to mom 😬 classy Oh FFS |
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Post by constancespry on Jul 26, 2022 16:52:42 GMT
A normal 11 year old does not want to sleep in the same bed with his mother (or father or parents). She is supposed to encourage him to grow into his own person, with his own life, friends, etc., and become independent, instead of smothering him. It sounds like she has no boundaries and her life revolves entirely around him.
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Post by kittylady on Jul 27, 2022 0:07:14 GMT
The outdoors the lack of electronics... great. The rest of it? Way too intense. Is she seeing anyone else since her divorce or is she fulfilling all her emotional needs by turning her son into a surrogate husband? |
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Post by MsDark on Jul 27, 2022 3:21:13 GMT
So what's the deal? Are these 'kids in their bed til they're almost teens' couples just not having sex then?
Grabbing random quickies in the shower (closet? car?) during the day or some such shit?
Enquiring minds want to know.
Because even though my marriage ended after 19 years together, there was a lot of sex in it until about the last couple months. But no lie, it probably wouldn't have lasted a year with kids in the bed every night. Not unless we were both on the same page and our sex drives went dormant for that time.
I do know a couple for whom this dormancy was the case. They had a 2 year old and the wife confessed they hadn't had sex in over two years! But between her post-partum and his depression diagnosis following close behind, and both of them on anti-depressants, they were on the same page and not even concerned about it. And this was a young couple too! (26 and 27)
I mean...whatever floats their boat. But I could not imagine this.
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Post by notoriousmkg on Jul 27, 2022 15:31:25 GMT
TMI - we are not nighttime boot knockers, so it wasn't a problem.
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Post by louiswinthorpe111 on Jul 27, 2022 16:52:57 GMT
Funny story. My older boys always slept in their beds, but the youngest one would always crawl back into ours. He said he didn't like his room. I was like, "we are never getting rid of this kid out of our bed." He slept at the bottom, with the dog. When he was 5, we rearranged bedrooms and my oldest went into the basement. Minutes after, my then 5 year old was shoving all his clothes in a grocery sack. He said, "I'm taking Jakes room." And he's never slept with us since. Turns out, he really hates this room, which is back to being my office!
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Post by notoriousmkg on Jul 27, 2022 18:39:23 GMT
Funny story. My older boys always slept in their beds, but the youngest one would always crawl back into ours. He said he didn't like his room. I was like, "we are never getting rid of this kid out of our bed." He slept at the bottom, with the dog. When he was 5, we rearranged bedrooms and my oldest went into the basement. Minutes after, my then 5 year old was shoving all his clothes in a grocery sack. He said, "I'm taking Jakes room." And he's never slept with us since. Turns out, he really hates this room, which is back to being my office! That is hilarious. I have to admit, before we had kids, and when I still thought it was never going to happen (we were married 10 years before our first child), I used to fantasize what it would be like to have a little kid. And I imagined them lying asleep and me having my body curled around them. And that's actually what happened. It was hard for me to let that go, much less push it away. But from everyone I've ever talked to, it resolves itself. There are some people who are kind of the opposite -- a lot of physical contact rubs them the wrong way, or they are really light sleepers, or they just have a very strong idea about who should be sleeping where. I get that. Ultimately, the goal is to guide your kids on a transition to independence - financially, emotionally, physically. |
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Post by tulip on Jul 27, 2022 19:15:29 GMT
My son sleeps like a rock. He never moves. When he was little I never minded if he came in bed with us because you could curl up with him and get a good night's sleep. My daughter, on the other hand, took over the entire bed. She'd sleep like a starfish. She'd roll over and you'd get smacked by one of her arms. They are both grown and my son still doesn't move and my daughter is all over the place. It is hilarious to see their beds in the AM. One is a mess, the other, he can just quickly pull up the covers and it's made.
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Post by MsDark on Jul 28, 2022 2:42:21 GMT
We had a co-sleeper crib that attached to the side of the bed when I was nursing Jr as a baby which was convenient. But when I stopped that DarkJr went into his own crib/bed. We went through a time after he transitioned to a regular bed at toddler age where the nighttime ritual of me reading him to bed usually resulted in me laying down in the bed with him until he fell asleep.
About 90% of the time I ended up falling asleep too, then waking about 1 or 2 in the morning (often due to something like a kid crowding me out or a foot in my face) all spaced out and dragging myself to my own room. Occasionally I would not wake until the next morning.
It became problematic for a few reasons: I usually had things I needed to get done after he went to bed that didn't get done. I'll admit that was probably the least important thing, but it was annoying. Way more important was that it affected how I felt and functioned the next day because of the sleep interruption and overall poor sleep quality. Lastly, it affected Jr's ability to fall asleep independently, and I would say his overall sleep quality was also poorer following an entire night of the two of us in his bed as opposed to him having it to himself.
Now there were plenty of times a storm or a nightmare or even a cold winter night would result in Jr crawling into our bed when he was a kid. We had a king-sized and there was nothing better than waking up on a winter morning with everyone in the bed and even the dog and cat on the top. In our bed this was easier to do without feeling like your sleep quality was negatively affected.
But for the most part, night-time after Jr was in his bed and asleep was our time. Not even always just for sex but to do grown up things like watching our DVR'd shows that were not kid-friendly. Shit, just having an adult conversation.
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